My dear Oscar,

I have failed to buy a gay magazine.

I keep setting out with my intention clear, knowing where I am going and what I am going to do when I get there, and yet there is some expected judgement and condemnation that stops me buying what I want! I am almost ashamed at the level of my cowardice. I am a man alone; I trot along with a little fluffy dog at my heels; I have a certain affected timbre in my voice, a certain expression, a way of looking, and yet to be upfront on the streets of Chortleton Spa, to march into the largest newsagents in the town and pick up the gay magazine seems beyond me. And why? Well, we have undergone changes in the law, so that sexual acts undertaken by all people over the age of sixteen are now legal, but still popular memory, and much of popular culture, classifies homosexuality as perverse and unwanted. Of course this is not the case across the board; there are streets and ghettos, clubs and cafes, where being gay is seen as the norm (although it must be said that it is a certain sort of gay that is the norm, mainly the under 35, white, and broadly middle class – oh, and ‘straightacting’!), but not really in Chortleton Spa. Here the majority of people do not openly know or acknowledge anyone who is gay, although among the younger crowd to have a gay friend is a fairly trendy thing, and there are knitting circles and flower arranging societies, even charity shops, where the older gay may find a home. Really! No notion of pride! The politically and seriously minded, happy and healthy homosexual needs to look elsewhere than provincial towns, to the real venues of the metropolis, or to the virtual world of the online community. We now have a virtual world which rubs in some sort of parallel to the real world, one which we access electronically. Yes, I am sure it sounds like gobbledegook to you, but believe me, it is really catching on. And the result is: you do not have to exist in the real world at all if you do not want to. There are hordes of eager young things available ‘online’ (as it is called!) to satisfy your every desire – all at a price, of course. Everything is at a price. Capitalism is the biggest fashion accessory of them all.  Everywhere.

Love to you,

Algernon B. Duffoure.